The Hardest Thing I've Ever Done

Well, here it is: the story of Conan's birth. Be warned, it's a little graphic in places. I completely understand if some of my readers prefer NOT to know all about what it took to get my little dude into the world! But I feel like it's time for me to write it down for posterity - you can decide to read or not to read at your own risk.

Winter Wonderland

Conan's winter storms finally abated and left us with this beautiful Christmas morning:



(I call them Conan's winter storms because they started 12/13 - the night after he was born - and continued non-stop for two weeks.)

Blue Boy

I felt strong enough today to play dress-up with Conan, here he is in the beautiful sweater set that Sandra in Chile knit for him. It's amazing how much time a baby takes up. The days just disappear and at the end of them it seems like all I've done is feed him, eat, and try and get a little rest myself between feedings while he naps. I'm starting to get my energy back, though - as you can see, I actually found a couple minutes to post on the blog here! Luckily between my Mom and Cary the laundry, dishes, shopping and cooking all gets taken care of without requiring effort on my part.

Conan Alexander Mapes

He's one week old today. He's cuter than all the cute things I've ever seen added together. Now if only he would sleep, even just a little bit, at night...

Due

Today's Conan's official due date. I had a lot of contractions last night, they kept me up until 1 am but then faded away. Damn. We might be close or we might have another two weeks to go, no way to tell. Here's hoping we're close!

Diaper & Nursery Update

New diaper tech: Gussets and Fold Over Elastic (FOE). I'm pretty pleased with how professional these look! I used the Wee Weka pattern and made 6 diapers. They are size small/medium so they won't fit right away but they should work for several months, supposedly up to about 25 lbs. This was my first time using FOE (which you have to order online from diaper-making supply places, they don't have it at Joann's or other "regular" fabric stores) and it takes a little getting used to. But it sure does make a nice neat finished diaper. These diapers definitly take more time to put together than the simpler ones I started with, but I think as baby Conan gets bigger and more active the gussets will really make a difference. I used up nearly all of the 10 yards of FOE I ordered though, so I'll have to go back to regular elastic & turned seams for a bit until I reorder. I still want to make another 10-12 newborn/small sized diapers anyhow, so I might go ahead and incorporate gussets into those. They aren't really that hard once you get the hang of them, I was pleasantly surprised.

In the nursery, we finally finished repainting the old white dresser, brought it back into the house, and set it up. Finally there is enough room to really organize all the baby clothes we've been given into dresser drawers! We also put up two of Will's paper star lantens, which make a lovely soft light in the room when it's dark. It's really relaxing, it'll be a nice space to sit in the rocker and nurse.
Now we just need to hang a few pictures on the walls and the nursery will be officially done! That feels like an accomplishment, even though we didn't really have to do any major work. I can't imagine what it would be like to have to pull down the plaster, re-wire, insulate, sheetrock and paint like Brian & Abby are doing. It was exhausting enough for me just to move out the old TV room stuff and move in the baby stuff. :)

Are we there yet?

One week to go... I hope. I've been having tons of prodromal labor (aka practice, false, or pre-labor). Basically this means contractions that hurt enough to wake me up and make me gasp, but not strong enough to stop me from being able to talk or move around. They are usually regularly spaced about 10 minutes apart, last a minute or two, and can go on for hours before just stopping. Apparently this starting & stopping is not uncommon, but it sure is frustrating! And it can/could go on for weeks without any progress... or it could turn into real labor at any minute - the worst part is not knowing.

Also, my belly is enormous. In fact, we've been calling it "The Enormity". Here's a side-view shot from the other night (I was pacing through some contractions):

This angle is a little odd but I think really captures how encumbered (or maybe eclipsed?) I feel:
Conan continues to grow & thrive, the Midwife estimates he's around 7 lbs now. He's a strong little kicker, too, and none too happy about how crowded and sqeezey it's getting in there. I keep telling him if he wants more room, he needs to come out here. It'll blow his mind how much room there is!